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Questions
On Sexual Sins
Question 1. I have often
been told that the gay lifestyle is wrong and that one has a need to change - whereas it
is difficult to believe such a story when one knows that to be gay is not a choice but is
a matter of what and who you are - surely a gay person who loves God and follows him will
be loved by God and still counted as one of his Children - can anyone out there give me
some biblical truth to back this up - this is a matter that I have been meaning to ask
someone for some time now but never know of this place and since I am here now, perhaps
some of you will enjoy this
little bit of homework. I have been told that there is somewhere in the Bible where it is
found but I don't know where it is! Can you help?
Answer Unfortunately, whoever has told you
that the Bible condones people continuing in the practice of a homosexual lifestyle has
sadly misled you. To clarify your question, there are at least four matter which the bible
clearly affirms: 1. God loves all people. 2. God hates and condemns the sin of
homosexuality. 3. Homosexuality is a choice, a sin we have chosen to commit. 4. In order
to be saved, one must turn from this and from all sin.
To answer your question, I will take these in the order listed above.
1. God loves all people. God has shown His love for all, including all who have sinned, by
providing us with all physical things. Further, as the ultimate proof of His love, He has
provided the way by which we can be saved, thought the blood of Jesus.
MAT 5:43 ¶ "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor, and hate
your enemy.'
MAT 5:44 "But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you
MAT 5:45 in order that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His
sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
ROM 5:6 For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.
ROM 5:7 For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man
someone would dare even to die.
ROM 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners,
Christ died for us.
2. God hates and condemns the practice of homosexuality. Both in the Old Testament and the
New, this is made clear in many passages. It is against the physical make-up of men and
women and the purpose of marriage. Notice the following passages.
LEV 20:13 'If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of
them have committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their
bloodguiltiness is upon them.
ROM 1:18 ¶ For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and
unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness,
ROM 1:19 because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it
evident to them.
ROM 1:20 For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power
and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so
that they are without excuse.
ROM 1:21 For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God, or give thanks; but
they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
ROM 1:22 Professing to be wise, they became fools,
ROM 1:23 and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of
corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and crawling creatures.
ROM 1:24 ¶ Therefore God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, that
their bodies might be dishonored among them.
ROM 1:25 For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the
creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
3. Homosexuality is a choice, not brought about by necessity. The very nature of sin is,
it is an act against the Law of God. Something that we choose to do and are deceived by.
Although we may be convinced that we have no choice, this is a part of our deception and
will prevent us from facing responsibility for our actions and recognizing our need to
change, if we are to please God.
1JOHN 3:4 Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness.
JAM 1:13 Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God
cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone.
JAM 1:14 But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust.
JAM 1:15 Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is
accomplished, it brings forth death.
4. In order to be saved, we must turn from our sins, including homosexuality. This is
clear from Paul's letter to the Corinthians where he mentions that some had been involved
in various sins, including homosexuality, but they had turned from them and, by the grace
of God, had received forgiveness of sins. If we continue in these things, we cannot
inherit the kingdom of heaven.
1CO 6:9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do
not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor
homosexuals,
1CO 6:10 nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall
inherit the kingdom of God.
1CO 6:11 And such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you
were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, and in the Spirit of our God.
Through the mercy of God, we can have the hope of eternal life, if we are willing to
submit to Jesus and turn from our sins. Being with God is worth more than any pleasures we
may have here during our short stay upon the earth. Contact
Gary
Question 2. Is it ok to just sleep with
a person and not have sex even when you are not married. Is it ok just to have foreplay
and not have sex.
Answer The problem here is, sin
(fornication) does not begin with the physical act, but in the thoughts and intentions of
the heart. Therefore, being involved with someone you are not married to, but are
physically attracted to, can only cause tremendous temptation to commit fornication. In
order to avoid this, our thinking must be controlled, along with our actions. Ultimately,
to prevent fornication, the bible teaches that we should marry. Here are some passages
that may help to answer your questions.
MAT 15:10 And after He called the multitude to Him, He said to them, "Hear, and
understand.
MAT 15:11 "Not what enters into the mouth defiles the man, but what proceeds out of
the mouth, this defiles the man."
MAT 15:12 Then the disciples came and said to Him, "Do You know that the Pharisees
were offended when they heard this statement?"
MAT 15:13 But He answered and said, "Every plant which My heavenly Father did not
plant shall be rooted up.
MAT 15:14 "Let them alone; they are blind guides of the blind. And if a blind man
guides a blind man, both will fall into a pit."
MAT 15:15 And Peter answered and said to Him, "Explain the parable to us."
MAT 15:16 And He said, "Are you still lacking in understanding also?
MAT 15:17 "Do you not understand that everything that goes into the mouth passes into
the stomach, and is eliminated?
MAT 15:18 "But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and
those defile the man.
MAT 15:19 "For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries,
fornications, thefts, false witness, slanders.
MAT 15:20 "These are the things which defile the man; but to eat with unwashed hands
does not defile the man."
1CO 6:18 Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the
immoral man sins against his own body.
1CO 6:19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you,
whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?
1CO 6:20 For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.
1CO 7:1 Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch
a woman.
1CO 7:2 But because of immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman
have her own husband.
1CO 7:3 Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her
husband.
1CO 7:4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and
likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
To summarize, our thinking, as well as our actions, must promote that which is good.
Placing ourselves in situations where we think about committing fornication and where we
are tempted and encouraged to lose control of our sexual desires, is not the purity of
mind and body that God desires for each one of us. Marriage is the realm in which God has
given men and women the right to satisfy their sexual desires in a way that is pleasing to
Him and is best for society. Contact Gary
Question 3. I would value your opinion
on the subject of nonmarital sexual relations between loving individuals. According to
most literal passages in the Bible, sexual relations are not permitted. In fact, the only
thing that is acceptable is total worship and adoration of God, himself. I can't believe
that God would be so selfish as to not allow his children to express feelings, drink a
glass of wine, etc. As long as our expressions are not errant, how could this be. We are
provided with this source of pleasure; is it just a temptation? Where in the Bible is this
clarified?
Answer It is true that God requires our
devotion to Him above all others, even above our own selves. Luke 14:26 is a good passage
to show this, where Jesus uses the word "hate" for our physical relationships in
comparison to the love for the spiritual. Yet He also promised that those who would
forsake these things would not be left unfulfilled. In Mark 10:29-30, He said,
"…there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or father or mother
or wife or children or lands, for My sake and the gospel's, who shall not receive a
hundredfold now in this time houses and brothers and sisters and mothers
and children and lands, with persecutions and in the age to come, eternal life.
It is also true that God has instilled within us certain fleshly desires. Yet He has
provided lawful ways in which these desires can be fulfilled. In the matter of sexual
fulfillment there is only one acceptable way, and that is through marriage. 1 Cor. 7:16
shows this conclusively. Because fornications(sexual immoralities) are natural tendencies,
it was by God's ordination that these desires be fulfilled in marriage. From the very
beginning this was so. In Matt. 19:19 Jesus goes beyond the prevailing Jewish law and
tradition and appeals to the design of creation for His arguments that this relationship
is intended to last for life. So startling was this teaching that even to His disciples
were questioning whether it was even worth marrying in that case. It seems they had the
same notion about marriage that we have today in our society, because this teaching is
hard to take for many. Today, this same attitude is displayed in statements such as,
"I can't believe that God would (or wouldn't) allow (this or that)" But Jesus'
reply is equally uncompromising: "Not all men can accept this statement, but those to
whom it has been given." I believe that what He meant was most people would not wish
to conform themselves to God's will, but would rather pursue the fulfillment of their own
desires in their own way. That's one reason why after saying that anyone who seeks God
will find Him (Matt. 7:78), He said only a few will enter into the kingdom of heaven
(Matt. 7:13-14). Part of seeking involves conforming to what has been "found."
Incidentally, the passage in 1 Cor. 7 would also contradict those who teach that the only
purpose for sex in marriage is for procreation. Clearly, this is not the reason stated
here, but rather for the acceptable fulfillment of our desires. I would also add that love
involves seeking the best for the object of our love. Biblical love (Greek, agape) does
not involve "good feelings" or "warm fuzzies." Those feelings may
certainly be part of love and may grow out of it, but when Jesus said we should love our
enemies (Matt. 5:4348), He meant that we should always seek the best interest of everyone,
even those who hate us. Put simply, He wants us to become like Him. Every man who sins is
His enemy, and if it were not for His desire for us, He would not have provided
instructions for us to follow that we might obtain life. However, a refusal of His council
can only result in eternal death. Contact Doug
Question 4. What does the Bible say
about sexual harassment? What saving truth does the church uphold which is threatened by
sexual harassment? How then does the faith evaluate the problem? What concrete steps does
the church invite and challenge its believers to take?
Answer This is a very good question and is
in some ways complex because we are dealing with "modern" definitions which
don't always "fit" into biblical concepts. First, let me say that I will
set forth what the Bible says about it, not what the "Church" says about it.
I do not know exactly what you mean by "Church", but usually there is a
denominational or Catholic idea behind it. The church, rather than being a
collection of congregations ruled by a convention or Pope, is simply those who are saved
by Christ in the way He directs. See Acts 2. They work and worship in
independent local congregations and seek to follow the Word in their individual lives and
while working together. They do not follow "traditions" or
"rules" laid down by a ruling person or body that is of human origin. If
we believe in what the Bible says, we should follow this, no matter what Protestantism or
Catholicism might say about it!
Now, from the Bible viewpoint, the only lawful sexual relations are to take place in
marriage. Matt. 19:1-6, Eph. 5:22-33. These relationships are to always be
voluntary, not forced even by the husband or the wife. 1 Cor. 7:1-5.
Therefore, what the world condones, voluntary sexual freedom outside of marriage is
condemned by the Bible. Gal. 5:19-22. Further sexually charged speech and
actions such as looks toward those that are not your spouse (husband or wife) are
condemned by the Bible. Matt. 5:27-30, Eph. 4:29, 5:1-17.
As far as the word's (generally speaking) definition of sexual harassment, the Bible
would agree that it is wrong. When someone in a position of power, speaks or acts in
ways that "offend" (sin" against someone and imply or insist on sexual
gratification, they are wrong! This is true whether the aggressor is a man or a
woman. Gen. 39, 1 Samuel 13.
If a Christian is being harassed in this way by someone of the world, the laws are
there for their protection. Rom. 12:14-13:7. And, if the person is a Christian
that is doing the harassing, even a preacher or elder, there are steps also to be taken to
bring them to repentance. Matt. 18:15-17, 1 Cor. 5. Contact Gary
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